My penultimate Blog

Firstly we have a missing Meisterism (can't quite remember the context of this one). "Wouldn't it be great to be the bullet proof man, dodging all those bullets". And why would you want to dodge them Meister?

One more Blog to go to try and wrap this incredible journey up.

We Did it Wanchai

As they say, "It ain't Over 'Till the Fat Bloke Sings", so this seemed to be an ideal way to end my contribution to the Blog (well probably). It really should be an Elvis song given our experience in the White Stag, although I'm sure he has sung this at some stage, most people have. But it's Frank Sinatra's My Way that's going to end things, specially adapted to pay homage to our home from home in Hong Kong. Sing it loud and sing it proud.
　
And now, the end is near,
And we approach the final posting.
My friends, we're all now home,
We’ve had such fun, and we're not boasting.
We’ve lived a week that's full
We’ve drunk in bars and that is no lie.
And more, much more than this,
We did it Wanchai.

Headaches? We’ve had a few,
But then again, we did deserve them.
We did what we had to do
Without much sleep, without exemption.
We planned each bar and club,
Each restaurant, never a day dry,
And more, much more than this,
We drank in Wanchai.

Yes, there were times, I'm sure we knew,
When we stayed out, more than we should do,
But through it all, when there was beer,
We drank it all and called for more.
We drank all that and still went back,
To dear old Wanchai.

We’ve loved, we’ve laughed and cried,
Bet on some nags, that end up losing,
But now, as tears subside,
We find this blog all so amusing.
To think we wrote all that,
And may we say, not in a shy way,
Oh no, we're there again,
We're down in Wanchai.

For what is Hong Kong? What has it got?
If not Wanchai, then it has naught,
To the White Stag, just every night,
Trawl round the bars, until first light.
The HodgeBlog shows, we drank Tsing Taos
And did it Wanchai.
　

Tour Quotes and Meisterisms

All the way through the trip there would be little asides, exchanges and comments that prompted smiles, laughs, guffaws or the occasional episode of apoplexy (largely depending on how much alcohol we’d had at the time). The challenge for us all was remembering these when it came to putting the blogs together. I think we did a pretty good job but the consensus was that we should consolidate some of the favourites into a single post. What follows therefore is a list of those we can remember, some already recorded, as the observant reader will realise, and some that have not. Most have not been attributed, as it’s often difficult to remember who said what, but for those present there will be some noticeable ‘Meisterisms’.

"Do you want any tea or coffee to go with your biscuits?"
"Won’t it be cold by the time we get there?"
(exchange with Harrods rep at Heathrow, buying a gift for our HK hotel booker)


"Can I help you out with any directions?"
"Which way is Hong Kong?"
"I think most people head for Departures sir"
(the afore-mentioned Harrods rep joins in the fun)


"The flight doesn’t close until 6:20, we’ll leave about 6:00"
(sitting in a bar at Heathrow prior to seeing the [Gates C - via Transit - 20 minutes] sign)


"Could you put me in a room with Jacuzzi"

"Forget the MTR, let’s go from the Wanchai Ferry Terminal, it’s closer and we can walk it"
(A comment that had me well on the way to my target of losing 25% of my bodyweight in sweat on this trip!)


"You wanna watch?"
"Why, what are you going to do?"
"Let me think about it for a minute"
"We might not get a second chance"
"On the face of it I don’t need one"
"They’re not second hand are they?"
(by this time the bemused hawker had turned his attentions elsewhere)　


"Do we want Tsim Sha Tsui or East Tsim Sha Tsui?"
"Dunno, depends how hungry you are I suppose"
(on being faced with a choice of MTR stations)


"Hi Lons, you OK?"
"No"

[Sing as though no-one can hear you and] dance like Virgil from Thunderbirds practising River Dance whilst
being stung by a swarm of wasps.

"You don’t see many goalkeepers standing on their feet these days"

‘Seriously, f**k off and get some sleep you attention seeker’
(A loving text from home)


"So you’ve got a 2 for 1 offer on Margaritas?"
"No it’s a 1 for 1 offer"
"Erm yes, so we get 2 for every 1 we buy?"
"No, you get 1 for every 1 you buy"
" Erm OK, so we can buy 4 and get 8?"
"Yes"
"OK, we’ll have 8 Margaritas, no we’ll have 4, but you’ll bring us 8 right?"
"Yes"
(At the Café Déco in the Venetian Casino, Macau- proving that syntax doesn’t transcend international boundaries that well)


"Of course it’s tomorrow now isn’t it"
(10 minutes past midnight at the above mentioned Café Décor, probably still waiting for those Margaritas)


"It’s that Big Moon Day today"
"Yes, but I don’t think it’s compulsory"
"Good, I don’t want to make an arse of myself"

"I’ll have a Tsing Tao please"
"Your drink sir"
"Thanks, but could you take the ginger ale back and bring me a Tsing Tao"
(In Dickens bar – proving that, like syntax, language doesn’t transcend international boundaries that well either)


"See if you can get a Grouper discount Pete"


"Oi Guilo, leave that fish alone"
(Pink Floyd cover from the Rainbow Restaurant on Lamma Island).


"I used to be a member of the Magic Circle but I’ve now joined the Magic Square, it’s similar but we don’t cut corners"

"Don’t talk to me about sophistication, I’ve been to Leeds"

"There’s one of those indoor outdoor swimming pools down there"

"Could you do us some shots Johnny?"
"Do you want nice or do you want nasty?"
(could have been any one of 8 nights at the White Stag)


"How would you like your steak sir?"
"In a baguette"
(In Wooloomooloo, one of HK’s most exclusive steakhouses)


"Let's not go to Wanchai tonight"
(No, never heard that one!)

Sad to say ...

And now for that final Blog to close this chapter of my life’s experience.

What I can say without hesitation is that I will always have fond memories the travelling party and those who so graciously received us and looked after us during the tour. Here are a couple of group photo’s and it is clear that we were all having one hell of a good time. There was the dinner at the American Restaurant:

The grand Venetian Casino (main entrance):

And that unforgettable experience in the White Stag with guest appearance from Debbie McGee:

So it was that the tour had to come to an end and it is only fair to take a quick peek at our principle reason for being there in the first place – the mighty Hodge – must have been a good one that’s all I can say:

And just in case you don’t know the chorus to that old Harry Belafonte favourite - all together now:

And I'm sad to say

I'm on my way

Won't be back for many a day

My heart is down

My head is turning around

We had to leave a little girl in Hong Kong town.

That's All Folks!!!!!

Reflections of my mind.

OK, so it’s time for another entry from the Meister (can I say that?). Time indeed, for a little reflection on some of the key characters in our little tour party.

Now any regular reader of this blog will be well aware that Lons was not too well during the trip – seeking attention obviously! But here are a couple of pictures that provide proof he was not quite himself. It started with a demonstration of a real passion for a certain royal (or was it what she was drinking?

Clearly, he was a little upset by the encounter and promptly fell ill (and asleep or dead on the way to Macau)…

… where he kept disappearing for some reason!!

Must say he didn’t look too good – and it certainly wasn’t the Margarita’s that caused the problem!

I guess this is how he really felt:

Quite a good likeness I thought!!!

Now, the Blog mentions the legendary Kiwi in a number of places and for a variety of reasons. One of these being his ability to sleep anywhere and in any position. Well here is the proof. At Happy Valley - clearly not sufficient stimulus to keep awake!

On the Tram….

… and at the end of a memorable tour in the White Stag (Ahhhhhh!!!):

Clearly in need of greater stimulus!!

Incidentally, Kiwi and Clive did their best to keep their distance - either that or someone ‘let rip’!

Which one do YOU think looks more relieved???

Or perhaps it was just the Invisible Man trying to get to the bar??

Now, someone somewhere made a few comments about the size of my – well – tripod (well it has to be called something!). But the interesting question is ‘was the beer glass very large or the tripod very small - these Blogs can be deceptive?’

And now to a few Hong Kong anomalies:

This was interesting from the perspective there was no work taking place and no danger of anything (other than walking into the barriers) – clearly just nowhere else to store things like this.

One cannot tour Hong Kong without observing the interesting naming conventions. Would YOU buy jewellery from this store?

Now I know where all those camel toes come from – the grow on trees (at least they do in Hong Kong!

And clearly somewhere you go to relax after a frustrating day shopping and being unable to find what you are looking for!

That’s it for now. Just one more Blog to come from me.

Eine Kleine Nachtmusik

Or for those who prefer English, A Little Night Music, or for any pretentious twats out there, Mozart's Serenade No 13 for Strings in G Major. Anyway here are a couple of videos of the nightly lightshow that plays across HK Island's skyscrapers. It's a very popular attraction this and easy to get to, just get one of the Star Ferries over to TST and follow the crowds to the viewing gallery just before 8pm every night.

At the beginning of the second video you'll here Meister telling me " I can't get any of these", proof that by using point and click methodology you might not get great photos but you do get something. I'm sure Meister did get some video and photos of the lightshow though and suspect they are better quality than these. Hopefully he'll share them with us.

NB - Just played these videos and they look awful, uploading them to the blog also seems to have overlayed machine gun fire across the soundtrack. Anyway I'll leave them on here, but I suggest you remove any pets from the room before pressing the play button!

Come on England !

Up earlyish this morning in eager anticipation of the England v Scotland Rugby World Cup game, so you might get a little bloggage.

Al will actually be at the England game having popped over to Auckland for it - 'popped over' in the context of a near 11 hour flight of course.

Not sure it will be a high scoring game but I'm keeping the faith and have just backed England to win by 15 points or more.

COME ON ENGLAND !

NB - I note with some amusement that Tonga are 13-6 up at half time against the French. This could be an entertaining morning.

Post Game Update - Well I lost my money but England won the game, just, and Scotland are on the plane home. Bit of a scrappy game but an exciting last 10 minutes, Al must have enjoyed it. England face France in the quarter finals and, judging by their respective performances today, it won't be a classic.


　
　

Take a Peak

I see that Meister has added a few photos so here are a few more and a couple of videos, taken at The Peak. A trip to The Peak is an absolute must for the fantasic views of Hong Kong Island and across the harbour to Kowloon. There are buses that go to the peak, taxis are cheap and I suppose if you had some sort of deathwish you could try walking it. But the best way is to take the Peak Tram which climbs its way perilously up an implausibly steep incline to the top.

It's pretty commercialised at the top with a shopping mall, restaurants and the obligatory souvenir stalls.There are also some marked trails for walks around the peak, although according to Lons you shouldn't take any notice of the one that says it's only a 30 minute walk. There are plenty of observation points to take in the views but they do charge a few dollars to get to the very highest ones. It's well worth it though and you can pay by Octopus card.

Time for the Kids!

Whilst Hong Kong was essentially a trip for the over 50’s (sorry Lon’s – whilst you are not over 50 you certainly looked like it for most of the trip!), I cannot allow the Blog to remain entirely for the benefit of us mature folk. We must also consider those youngsters who may stumble upon this masterful work and ask ourselves - what is there in this that would hold their interest?

This section should therefore be viewed as the ‘interactive’ content and an opportunity for the little folk to engage more directly.

Instructions:

1. Ensure your computer is connected to a printer, that this is loaded with paper and that there are adequate supplies of ink.
2. Select one of the pictures below
3. Print the selected picture
4. Proceed to colour the selected picture.

Is it just me or does Pete have a strange resemblance to Robert Robinson of ‘Call My Bluff’ fame?

Happy colouring kiddies!!

Man Work’s Down the Chip Shop …

Well it’s been a week or so since the travellers returned from their sabbatical so I thought I would drop a few more items into the Blog and could not do so without providing some evidence that Elvis really is alive and kicking (well shallow breathing at least) in the White Stag in Wanchai. This guy is clearly dehydrating and in serious need of a drink!

The more observant of you might also notice David Bailey in the background - a little more rotund than I remember him but still clicking.

The disinterested lounger is of course the great 'Hodge' doing his best not to 'get on down' and join Elvis in a duet. Interesting that Elvis actually did a duet with Hodges called 'I Will Be Home Again' - bet he felt a right Charlie!

The following examples demonstrate quite clearly that, for some of the cheery chums, enjoying a well earned break from the office also involves concentrating on the job in hand (well at least the one we can publish pictures of):

These guy's really do take their responsibilities as fathers and husbands seriously don't they - never a quiet moment to yourselves even when on drinking duty on the other side of the globe!

Mind you, the following might rate as interesting diversions for the less encumbered of visitors to Hong Kong - those with somewhat fewer domestic responsibilities:

More to come from the Meister soon!

Funny to the End

You can't really go to somewhere like Hong Kong without the childish pursuit of pointing out silly names. Meister has some of them on camera and I suspect he'll create a post just for them when he's sorted out his photos. However to be going on with, and proof that this tour has been funny to the end, our cab driver to the airport was one Chu Fook Hing.Seems like an ideal room mate for Pete.

3 and a half days and 15 nights

A final post from Hong Kong as the netbook will be going in the suitcase soon. Lons and I have a 6pm check-out ready for an 11:15pm flight. Pete and Hodge will only be around 3 hours from Blighty by now and Meister will be around 5 hours into his journey. Not too sure about Kiwi's plans, when are we ever, but I believe he's on a train heading into mainland China. Al is in Canada on a business trip so come midnight none of the 'Magnificant Seven' will be left in Hong Kong.

There are so many things and moments to look back on but that will come later in quiet reflection. I'm also sure there'll be many things that are remembered when we meet up again in the UK and start chatting about the trip. I really can't say that there's been a single highlight for me, the whole trip has been fantastic and, apart from my travelling companions who really made it a great trip, Hong Kong itself has been the star. It can best be summed up in the title of this post, which is the answer to the question "how long were you in Hong Kong?" It's that sort of place.

Homeward bound

Sat in the airport with Pete at 04.30 waiting to check in for our Quantas flight at 07.35.  Pete is confident that we can upgrade but I question his abilities to do this  on the basis he hasn't been able to negotiate himself a single room at the hotel all week. Clive surprised us all tonight at one minute past midnight (well not Lons as we was tucked up in bed) announcing it was his birthday - he certainly kept that quiet but many happy returns mate.  Clive was quick to point out that his birthday will last 31 hours taking account of the 7 hour time difference - as if he needs an additional 7 hours!
It's times like these that you reflect on your family and what they mean to you.  I've missed them desperately and it's only been an hour since we said goodbye back at the hotel.

It's Four in the Morning

And so it is, "It's four in the morning and once more the dawning just woke up the wanting in me".

The fact is that it is four in the morning and I've just said goodbye to Hodge and Pete who jumped in a cab to the airport for a 7am flight. I suspect Kiwi is still in reception trying to blag Lons' room number so that he can wake him up, Lons having made a sensible exit earlier to catch some well needed sleep. Meister fell by the wayside a little later but that's understandable as he's on a mid-day Sunday flight, I might see him for breakfast if I decide not to sleep. Lons and I are on a flight around 11pm Sunday so I'll no doubt catch up with him later. The Kiwi? you may well ask (again), he's heading into China somewhere for a bit of business and a bit of pleasure. I just hope he gets the balance right, and has sorted his visa, his credit cards, his bank account, his wardrobe and his life.

Please be assured that this blog has not closed, it will continue for at least a couple of weeks as we get back to blighty, remember a few things that happened and post some photos (Meister has 843 at the last count). We're looking to finish with some quotes from the tour, including the famous Meisterisms, so watch this space - actually don't keep watching it now, it may be some time.

The Steaks are High

Friday night and we decided to treat ourselves for a sort of 'Last Supper'. Our restaurant of choice was the strangely named Wooloomooloo Steakhouse on the 31st Floor of the Hennessy Tower on Hennessy Road, and we managed to get a window table. Having been astounded by the views over the city we were even more astounded by the prices on the menu - Hodge was happy he hadn't agreed to pick up the tab on this one. Pride of place in the menu went to the 20 oz Porterhouse which ended up on the plates of four hungry tourists. It was quite an exclusive place and the service was second to none, however they were a bit fazed by Pete who when asked how he liked his steak answered "in a baguette". As Pete might say "Don't talk to me about sophistication, I've been to Leeds".

After the meal we adjourned to the roof top terrace bar to get over the shock of the bill. This was my first sighting of the Hong Kong skyline at night and I really don't think there'll be a better one. Vertigo sufferers beware, this is not for the faint hearted, and it wasn't helped when Hodge and Meister started a discussion about suicide methods and whether throwing yourself off a high building was better than drowning. I think I stepped back from the edge at that point.

The view was clearly too much for Kiwi who decided to take a nap in one of the lifts - seriously though he just needed to collect himself (well nobody else would!) before joining the intrepid adventurers later in the evening.

We considered trying to parachute from the top of the building into the White Stag but that would have meant putting a severe dent in the world's silkworm population, so we decided to use the lift, stepping over Kiwi on the way. Onwards into Wanchai to find a bar with air conditioning and without loud thumping music, not easy on a Friday night. But we settled into The Doghouse (where Meister had another chance for laser treatment) for a couple of pleasant beers before an inevitable visit to the White Stag.

Releasing Don

OK, now we have to address the burning question, what's hapenned to Don? I'm sure Don's plight has gripped the world in a "who shot JR" sort of way over the last week and I can now reveal all in the final episode of this saga. As readers who have been with us from the start will recall, Don was leased from a donkey ride operator on Brighton beach by Meister just before we came away. Along with some industral strength laxatives and a length of strong rope this was to be Hodge's birthday surprise as we set him and Don marauding down Wanchai main street. We did start to feel sorry for Don though and felt it was unkind to subject him to this, we had no such worries about Hodge of course.

So we've granted Don his wish and set him free. He wasn't really happy in the stables we selected for him and had already moved in with Donna, a Jenny that he met and fell in love with on a night out in Wanchai. He now wants to stay, marry Donna and apply for Hong Kong residency so Meister will have some explaining to do to that bloke on Brighton beach. We had a bit of a whip round to send the happy couple on their way but I'm not sure how long it will last in this city. Don has already been spotted down at the Star Ferry Terminal with a sign reading "Will Bray for Hay". So all our best wishes to Don & Donna as they set out on their new life together (and while we're at it we should probably say the same to Selby & Ginny who tied the knot on the day we left). 

Pete - The Final Room Mate

Right enough of that culture stuff, I'm sure you're all waiting to hear what's hapening with Pete and his ever-changing room mates. Well he finally got fed up with Walter Sidebottom and stormed down to reception to complain. As a consequence he spent his last night in the hotel sharing with Jurt Osser, a marine biologist from Stockholm. It seems Pete's Anglo-Saxon may have let him down as well !

The Culture Bit - Part 2

After another strategic exit from the bars of Wanchai before the sun came up I set off reasonably early this morning on another cultural trail. First stop was the small Tin Hua Temple which is just the other side of Victoria Park from the hotel. Then a combination of three MTR journeys took me to Wong Tai Sin in Kowloon and the wonderful Sik Sik Yuen Wong Tai Sin Temple. This is a whole temple complex covering about 18,000 square metres and, like many temples in this region, celebrates three religions, Buddhism, Taoism and Confucianism. Exactly what the latter would have to say about the souvenir stalls and fortune tellers outside the temple I don't know. "Man who build Temple must sell cheap keyring to Pilgrims" maybe. Anyway here are some photos, the first two are of Tin Hua and the rest from Sik Sik Yuen Wong Tai Sin.

The Culture Bit - Part 1

Just to prove that we have seen a little of cultural Hong Kong, well I have, here are a few photos of the Po-Lin Monastery and the Big Buddah, and he was big even by my standards. A good day out this one, 30 minutes by MTR to Chung Tung on Lantau Island then either a cable car, for those not hungover, or a bumpy twisting 40 minute bus ride (the number 23) through the mountains, for those who are just a bit hungover, to Ngong Ping. It's all a bit commercialised when you get there but it's worth the trip. I think Meister may have gone today.